More on Punjabi Jokes …

Love and Marriage Punjabi Sms

Girl to Boyfriend: Mummy-Papa Ne Keha Hai Ke Jekar Main Paperan Ch Fail Ho Gayi Tan, Mera Viah Kar Dena.
Boyfriend: Tu Tyari Kitti E Na?
Girl: Kar Lyi E, Bas Reception Di Dress Leni Baaki E?

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Santa: Jad Mera Nava-Nava Viah Hoya Si Tan Menu Meri Voti Aini Changi Lagdi Hundi Si Ke Dil Karda Si Ke Ohnu Kha Hi Jawa…
Banta: Te Hun Kidda Lagda E?
Santa: Hun Na Puch Yaar, Hun Lagda E Ke Je Khaa Janda Tan Mere Tidd Ch Dard Ho Jana Si…

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Jadugar to Santa: Hum Main Teri Votti De Do Hisse Kar Davanga…
Santa: Kidda Diya Galla Karda Bai, Mere Ko Ik Ni Sambh Hundi, Tu Meri Problem Nu Double Karn Te Tulya E…

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Ik Leader Apni Tiwi Nu: Main Apna 50 Crore Da Beema Karvaya E…
Wife: Eh Tusi Bada Changa Kamm Kitta E, Hun Menu Baar-Baar Ni Kehna Paina Ke Apna Khyaal Rakho…

Husan Di Taareef

Wife: Meri Umar 45 Hon De Baawjood Vi Tuhada Ik Dost Meri Husan Di Taareef Karda Ni Thakda…

Husband: Ik Hi Banda Kar Sakda E, Oh Maange Raam? Haina?

Wife: Oh God, Sahi Keha, Tuanu Kive Pta…

Husband: Kabaadi E Na…

Husband Di Saza

Husband Naal Ladai Karn Ton Baad, Tivi Ne Apni Maa Nu Phone Kitta: Mummy Osne Fer Mere Naal Ladai Kitti E, Main Tuade Kol Aa Rahi Han…

Maa: Na Putt Na, Ohnu Ohdi, Galati Di Keemat Chukaani Pavegi,
Tu Na Aa, Main Aa Jaani Aa Tere Kol…

Husband Wife Problem

Wife: Oh Sweet Heart, Tusi Kinne Pyare Ho? Meri Photo Hamesha Apne Naal-Naal Rakhte Ho? I Love You…
Husband: Jad Vi Koi Problem Aundi Hai, Main Tuhadi Photo Dekh Lenda Han, Te Problem Solve Ho Jandi Hai.
Wife: So nice, Tusi Dekhya Main Tuhade Layi Kinni, Lucky Han?
Husband: Jee Bilkul, Jad Vi Koi Problem Hundi Ae, Tuhadi Photo Dekh Ke Menu Oh Problem Vi Nikki Jehi Lagdi Hai, Sochda Han Ke Jad Aidi Problem Nu Jhalda Han, Eh Tan Kujh Vi Nhi…

Wife to Husband – Ki Karde Ho

Wife Husband Nu Phone Karke Kehendi Hai: Hello, Jee Tusi Ki Karde Pye O?
Husband: Darling, Main Bahut Busy Han, Bada Kamm Hai Ajj Office Te?
Wife: Oho, Kinna Karna Painda Hai Tuhanu? Ajj Pata Laga?
Husband: Ki Kariye Sohniye, Karna Painda Hai? Tusi Ki Karde Ho?
Wife: Main Tuhade Peeche Table Te Han, Te Bacche Puch Rahe Ne Aa Daddy De Naal Kudi Kaun Aa…

Potato Fever – Aaloo Bukhara

Pappu :”fruitwalay baba, give me some potatoes fever
Fruitwala :”Ahh ‘potatoes fever’ ki hunda hai ??
Pappu :”Oh my God, you illiteracy people, potatoes fever means “Aaloo Bukhara”

Teri Gusse Wali Ghoori

fire-walk-practice

Tu Beemar Ae, Eh Kehen Ton Darda Han Main
Teri Har Ik Ada Te Nakhre Te Marda Han Main
Roz Walk Te Janda Haan Karn Practice Bhajjne Di
Teri Gusse Wali Ghoori¬†Ton Darda Han Main…

Kudi Di Maa

40 Saal Da Ik Banda, Apne Vyah Lyi Kudi Nu Dekhan Gya,
Kudi Di Maa, Os Bande Nu Dekhde Hi Chingaad Marke, Behosh Ho Gyi,
Hosh Aaun Ton Baad Sabne Puchheya, Ki Hoya Ki Si Tenu?
Kudi Di Maa Ne Keha, Eh Banda 18 Saal Pehlaan Menu Vi Dekhan Aaya Si…

Funny Joke in Punjabi – Tivi Te Baba

Ik Tivi Babe De Kol Ja Ke Kehendi,
“Baba Jee, Mere Aadmi Menu Ghar Aunde Saar Maarna Peetna Suru Kar Dinda Hai”,
Baba Kehenda, “Aah Lai Taabeez, Jad Vi Tera Gharwala, Ghar Aave, Ehnu Apne Moonh Ch Paa Lavi Te,
Te Thodi Der Munh Na Kholi”,
7 Din Baad Tivi Khush Hundi Hoyi, Fer Babe Kol Gyi,
Kehendi, “Baba Jee Kamaal Ho Gya, Jad Tak Main Tabeez Nu Munh Ch Rakhdi Han, Oh Menu Kuch Ni Kehenda”
Baba Kehenda, “Beta, Aa Tabeez Da Ni Teri Jubaan Band Rakhan Da Fayda Hai…”

Suno Ji

wife : suno ji ! is hafte film dekhange te agle hafte puri shopping karange,
Husband : ohton agle hafte assi mandir javange,
Wife : oh kyun…?
Husband : bheekh mangange….